Pansexual, Polyamorous, and Genderqueer

These terms may mean something slightly different to each person, but here’s what they mean to me. I use these terms to identify myself, but they are just parts of my identity, not the entirety of my being.

I am pansexual because I find myself sexually, physically, and mentally attracted to persons of all genders (I believe that there are more than two genders, and I believe that the differences are gradual rather than a black-and-white distinction.) I sometimes say that I am “bisexual” since more people are familiar with that term, and for simplicity. I also am sexually attracted more often to guys, so I don’t mind the term “gay,” and I’ll use it in certain situations. But pansexual feels the most honest and complete, for me.

I am polyamorous because I believe that it is possible to love two or more people equally. I believe poly relationships can work, and that monogamy or serial monogamy isn’t the right solution for everyone. I’ve had one threesome, and though it was short term, it was fun. I haven’t had the opportunity to have a long-term poly relationship yet. While it isn’t a must, and I would certainly consider monogamous relationships if the right person came along, I really feel that a partly-open or a poly relationship suits me best and is ideal.

I am genderqueer because I feel more masculine at times and more feminine at others. I have no current desire to have surgery or take hormones, and I don’t want to permanently “lose” or change parts of my body. However, if there was a magic spell that could switch me between sexes at will, I would use it in a heartbeat (and often). As it is, I’m simply too lazy to go through the grooming rituals to be a “drag queen” and I’m too shy to be a performer. I don’t agree with society’s definitions of sex, gender, gender roles, and gender stereotypes. I consider myself transgender (and strongly support the trans community) even though I’m not currently persuing changes to my body. After all, gender is between the ears (not between the legs).

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Pansexual, Polyamorous, and Genderqueer

  1. Oh my god u cannot believe how inspired i am by u. I myself am a polyamorous pansexual but have actually encountered alot of hate cuz of it. I actually began to feel very alone till i saw your post, i just wish i could actually know who u are, but just so u know, although i dont know u, i love u, ty for being u

    • virginrocks says:

      Thanks very much for your comment. I’m glad to know this blog has helped you, at least in a small way.

      I wish there was less hate in the world, and I wish that everyone could be comfortable being their true self both online and in “real life.” Unfortunately, there are a number of reasons why I will remain anonymous on this blog… and am not comfortable giving out personal information yet.

      If you’d like to talk more, you can email me at ksazczin@trashmail.net (this is a temporary email address that should forward to me, but will expire soon) or else leave a reply letting me know how I can contact you … and we can perhaps chat more, anonymously for now.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: