Category Archives: The Lexicon

Goodness Gay-cious

Goodness gay-cious is kinda like “goodness gracious” only, like, gayer.

It’s an expression used to signify excitement or positive feelings. Example: “Goodness gay-cious, he’s a sexy dancer.”

Pansexual, Polyamorous, and Genderqueer

These terms may mean something slightly different to each person, but here’s what they mean to me. I use these terms to identify myself, but they are just parts of my identity, not the entirety of my being.

I am pansexual because I find myself sexually, physically, and mentally attracted to persons of all genders (I believe that there are more than two genders, and I believe that the differences are gradual rather than a black-and-white distinction.) I sometimes say that I am “bisexual” since more people are familiar with that term, and for simplicity. I also am sexually attracted more often to guys, so I don’t mind the term “gay,” and I’ll use it in certain situations. But pansexual feels the most honest and complete, for me.

I am polyamorous because I believe that it is possible to love two or more people equally. I believe poly relationships can work, and that monogamy or serial monogamy isn’t the right solution for everyone. I’ve had one threesome, and though it was short term, it was fun. I haven’t had the opportunity to have a long-term poly relationship yet. While it isn’t a must, and I would certainly consider monogamous relationships if the right person came along, I really feel that a partly-open or a poly relationship suits me best and is ideal.

I am genderqueer because I feel more masculine at times and more feminine at others. I have no current desire to have surgery or take hormones, and I don’t want to permanently “lose” or change parts of my body. However, if there was a magic spell that could switch me between sexes at will, I would use it in a heartbeat (and often). As it is, I’m simply too lazy to go through the grooming rituals to be a “drag queen” and I’m too shy to be a performer. I don’t agree with society’s definitions of sex, gender, gender roles, and gender stereotypes. I consider myself transgender (and strongly support the trans community) even though I’m not currently persuing changes to my body. After all, gender is between the ears (not between the legs).

The frog of my dreams.

They say you’ve got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince. Sometimes, I just wish they didn’t actually have to be frogs.

“The frog of my dreams” is my new way of saying the man or woman of my dreams. “The one,” or “soulmates” if you believe in those things. They aren’t necessarily perfect – they’re still a frog after all – but with this person, I will love them because of their faults, not in spite of them. They don’t have to be perfect by anyone else’s standards. And yes, when I kiss them, they’ll turn into my prince or princess.

It’s the kiss.

It’s the kiss.

I was going to say it’s the sex, but I really don’t like sex all that much. Magic happens in the kiss. It’s the romance, it’s the passion, it’s the intimacy – without all the complications.

It’s not the shit, because that “hot, cool, phat, badass, wicked, gay, words-that-have-opposite-meanings” shit is just confusing.

And it’s slightly more family friendly.

“It’s the kiss” is the newest phrase you’ll soon be uttering when your Long Island tastes really good, when your latest crush walks by your desk, when Lost does the opposite of jumping the shark.

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